Paper 1 feedback:
great thesis statements, overall -- but be concise
-- red thread(s) -- make sure your purpose is clear
-- include audience and how you know - Audience paragraphs are a good idea at the beginning; sets up a clear framework for the paper
-- including information about the text types -- why are certain features used, emphasized in relation to specific text type (inherent differences in various forms of media, how they get their messages across, and to whom)
-- including purpose -- relate points back to purpose in each paragraph (topic and/or concluding sentence), but not every other sentence
- use correct terminology of terms -- missed opportunities -- AP list in packets (esp. lacking in grammatical terminology - types of sentences - ethos & logos, image vs. imagery, juxtaposition, poetry terms...)
-- use multiple, specific examples from the text to back up points
-- push past: "this makes it credible" and "this makes it easy to read" or "draws the eye to"
-- avoid: "this" "it" "this is done to" -- be specific
-- avoid 'we' and 'us' until conclusion, and then make sure you discuss how effective the texts are, for whom, possible other interpretations/contexts...
- review tone words (see general resources tab)
great thesis statements, overall -- but be concise
-- red thread(s) -- make sure your purpose is clear
-- include audience and how you know - Audience paragraphs are a good idea at the beginning; sets up a clear framework for the paper
-- including information about the text types -- why are certain features used, emphasized in relation to specific text type (inherent differences in various forms of media, how they get their messages across, and to whom)
-- including purpose -- relate points back to purpose in each paragraph (topic and/or concluding sentence), but not every other sentence
- use correct terminology of terms -- missed opportunities -- AP list in packets (esp. lacking in grammatical terminology - types of sentences - ethos & logos, image vs. imagery, juxtaposition, poetry terms...)
-- use multiple, specific examples from the text to back up points
-- push past: "this makes it credible" and "this makes it easy to read" or "draws the eye to"
-- avoid: "this" "it" "this is done to" -- be specific
-- avoid 'we' and 'us' until conclusion, and then make sure you discuss how effective the texts are, for whom, possible other interpretations/contexts...
- review tone words (see general resources tab)